Guys, I’ve opened up about my life here to those who have been following me and also to the girls who are just arriving now, and one topic I noticed coming up frequently in the cultural contest was about abortion. Few people in my current circle of friends know – or those who have been my friends for many years or even close relatives – that in the year 2000 I lost a baby at 11 weeks pregnant. It was really hard for me to overcome and even when I got pregnant with my eldest daughter, the fears came back to the surface, I kept thinking, is it all going to happen again? Will it, will it, will it… But God fulfilled His promise and gave me this beautiful girl who is now almost a teenager.
Dealing with this loss was not easy and that’s why I consider it essential to have psychological support. For this, I recommend a psychologist with experience supporting women trying to conceive1. Learn about Famivita’s psychology services for those trying to conceive, and get your first assessment session for free. Click here to find out more!
So, what causes miscarriage? What is natural selection, how do you deal with this situation… Everything feels very strange. When I got the news I couldn’t believe it, it felt like a nightmare, lying there in the hospital room feeling groggy, unable to do anything, I felt helpless. I didn’t have the courage to ask the doctor about it; it was a feeling of emptiness and powerlessness.
Why Does Miscarriage Happen?
But why did this miscarriage happen at 11 weeks? It was almost three full months, a point that is generally seen as safer for pregnancy. In my case specifically, it was found I had a hormonal deficiency responsible for maintaining the pregnancy, and that caused the placenta to detach early. Of course, there are various factors that can interrupt a pregnancy and some things have a big influence2. These include external factors like smoking, alcohol consumption, drug use, as well as factors such as chromosomal abnormalities, trauma (falls, accidents, very invasive procedures that expose the uterus, like amniocentesis, for example).
There are also maternal factors, such as cervical incompetence3, malformed uterus, and many more. Miscarriage is not a pleasant situation; after all, losing a child is one of the worst pains a woman can go through. But no pregnancy is like another, I say this from my own experience. God works in mysterious ways, and over time, the pain turns into longing—a longing for someone you never even got to meet, but whom you already loved so much…
