The postpartum period is an important time for all women who have had a baby. This is a moment full of doubts and concerns, because in addition to all the changes in the body and hormonal fluctuations, the arrival of a new family member brings about changes in routine, as well as triggering psychological and emotional reactions.

It’s no surprise that many women go through a rollercoaster of emotions, becoming susceptible to comments, opinions, and everything that happens around them. Even for women who have already had a child and have now just had their second, uncertainties and worries remain, as each baby is different from the other, and the challenges can also be completely different.

Although many women prepare themselves to go through this stage, some will need the support of family, partners, and friends to make the postpartum phase lighter. Insecurities and doubts are common and even normal for anyone experiencing this, and throughout this article we will share tips on how to find support to make this a more peaceful time.

What is your support network?

We, as human beings, are social by nature and we depend on contact and help from others to have some of our needs met. No one lives alone, and that’s not even healthy, and in such a delicate time as the postpartum period, this need for support grows even stronger.

Having family close by is a great help for getting through this moment in life. That care and attention you get from a mother or grandmother, a sister or brother who comes to help, or an aunt or uncle who offers support, are fundamental for the new mother.

Not only family, but also friends are essential. Especially for those women who don’t have family living nearby, friends become their family, and every bit of support at this moment is very welcome.

Still, no matter how present the support network is, many times women can feel alone as they go through the postpartum period. Even for women who always dreamed of being mothers, the difficulties arise and the challenges become intense, because now a new life depends on them. There are many things happening at once and many worries to keep in mind, and often, women can intensely feel all the weight that comes with motherhood.

With the arrival of a baby, the household and the parents’ routine will be transformed, and even household chores can be left aside. This can end up overburdening the new mother who, besides taking care of the newborn, has concerns like washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning the house… The father’s presence and support at this time are crucial to ensure these tasks get done. In addition, friends and relatives are also essential support so the mother can devote more time to caring for the baby.

It’s important that everyone be aware that now, more than ever, the woman needs support, and even these simple tasks become a challenge with a baby at home. The new mother becomes an invisible caregiver, since often it’s inevitable that visitors end up focusing all their attention on the baby. Therefore, it’s important to remember there isn’t just a new baby in the house — there’s also a new woman who has just become a mother and is facing many challenges because of it.

And it’s not just help with household chores that matters. Being willing to listen is also a much appreciated gesture. Many times, all a mother needs is a hug, or just to be heard. Acts of care and empathy are essential for the mother to feel she has support and is not alone.

Most women who become mothers had a completely different routine before the baby arrived. Some worked eight-hour days, went to the gym, went to the mall every weekend or to the beauty salon, among other activities. At least for a while, all of these activities are put on hold, as all their energy goes toward caring for the baby.

For this reason, the postpartum period is an intensive and sudden dedication to many activities that weren’t previously part of daily life, and often mothers just want someone to talk to about how exhausted or scared they are with the new routine, and the support network is vital for fulfilling this need.

What does it mean to have a support network?

A support network will make the mother-baby relationship easier, helping out with whatever the mother needs during the postpartum period. It’s about being available and being there to provide the support the mother needs.

No child comes with an instruction manual – fortunately or unfortunately! That’s why all women are subject to trial and error during motherhood, and this is completely normal. The support network gives the necessary support for the mother to find her own way of raising her child, taking into account her own limits and possibilities.

Just as the newborn needs care, so does the mother. As the mother dedicates herself 24 hours to the baby who has just arrived, her own needs are put in second place, and that’s where the support network comes in to make self-care possible, providing the necessary support during the postpartum.

See also: Postpartum Care After Motherhood