Undoubtedly, raising a child is one of the most challenging tasks for parents. Teaching them right from wrong, what they can or cannot do, brings up many questions. But what about when they do something wrong? Does scolding a baby actually work?

Some of the main roles of parents are to comfort, protect, and guide their child, especially because a very young baby would not understand educational actions, making scolding not very helpful.

At this age, when a child does something they shouldn’t, it is necessary to guide them by showing that they should not do that. Of course, the child might not always remember, so it will be necessary to repeat the same instruction several times1.

Losing patience, yelling, or hitting are not the right approaches, even if parents feel frustrated; this behavior will only scare or hurt the baby.

Belittling or humiliating a child will only have disastrous consequences in the future. In any case, to avoid the need for such scolding, the ideal is to make your home a safe place so the child is not “tempted” to do things they shouldn’t.

If Scolding a Baby Doesn’t Work, What Should You Do?

Scolding a baby doesn’t work, but that doesn’t mean parents should let them do whatever they want. Actually, the best approach is to guide them. The keyword is “No”—but not just any “no”, it must be given firmly and always be consistent, for example: “Don’t touch that remote control!” rather than, “Don’t touch that remote control, okay, just a little!”

It’s essential to remember that very young children are completely innocent, and as annoying as this behavior might be, scolding, getting upset, or reacting exaggeratedly will accomplish little.

In fact, a recent study found that 39% of parents think their baby is provoking them when the child keeps changing the TV channels with a remote. Many parents get frustrated when a child engages in such behavior. The best bet is to remain calm and continue with your activities.

Setting Boundaries for Your Child

Each age group requires a different treatment and strategy to teach and correct2.

8 to 12 months

When the baby starts crawling—around eight months—it’s time to consider setting limits. Suddenly, everything from cutlery to electrical outlets becomes very interesting.

A child at this age only wants to explore (they have no concept of what they should or shouldn’t do), so if you don’t want them to touch something, put it out of reach using childproofing and let child-friendly items take center stage.

Experts say that this is the best way to help your child avoid trouble and makes it much easier to enforce the rules without having to scold the baby.

12 to 24 months

Around this age, the baby’s communication skills are blossoming, so you can start explaining basic rules—“don’t pull the kitty’s tail,” for example.

It’s also important to reserve the word “no” for serious situations, as overusing it can wear it out and ultimately make it completely meaningless, requiring a scolding the baby won’t understand.

The baby’s physical skills are also developing. A new walker will probably be excited about their newfound independence and frustrated by not being able to do everything they’d like.

24 to 36 months

The two-year mark brings the start of preschool, which is great for the baby’s socialization skills, but also introduces a new set of discipline challenges. Sharing toys, time, and attention is hard at this age.

My Baby Is Stubborn! How to Handle Baby Tantrums?

Babies and toddlers want independence and control over their environment—more than they can really handle. This can lead to conflict when a child thinks, “I can do this,” or “I want this, give it to me.”
When they find out they can’t do it—or can’t have everything they want—they might end up having a tantrum.

Tips

At such times, scolding the baby or child will have no effect, so here are some ideas that might help:

  • Give lots of positive attention. Get into the habit of “making a big deal” when the child does something good. Reward your little one with excitement and affection for positive behavior.
  • Try giving children a bit of control over small things. Offer minor choices, like “Do you want orange juice or lemon juice?” or “Do you want to brush your teeth before or after a bath?” That way, you’re not asking “Do you want to brush your teeth now?”—which will almost certainly be answered with “no.”
  • Keep objects out of sight and out of reach—This makes it harder for “mischief” to happen, so there’s no need to scold the baby. Obviously, this is not always possible, especially outside the home, where you can’t control the environment.
  • Distract the child—Take advantage of your little one’s short attention span by offering something else in place of what they can’t have. Start a new activity to replace the frustrating or forbidden one. Or simply change the setting. Take the child outside or move to a different room.
  • Help the child learn new skills and succeed. Assist your child in learning how to do things. Praise them so they feel proud of what they can do. Also, start with simple things before moving on to more challenging tasks.
  • Know your child’s limits—To avoid scolding the baby (since it doesn’t help), it’s important to know their limits. If you know your child is tired, avoid going out shopping or asking them to behave, since it simply won’t happen.

As seen above, scolding the baby is not a very effective educational method. Children need reasons, guidance, and explanations about why they shouldn’t do something.

Many times parents forget that, despite their small size and limitations, babies and children are intelligent beings who can learn without resorting to the “law of the strongest.” Therefore, ideally above all, over any method or practice, remaining calm is essential for achieving great results.

See also: Patience Test – How to Handle Tantrums and Outbursts?
Photos: Citril