Fear during childhood is as natural as any stage in a child’s life. Of course there are healthy fears of the unknown, but there are also fears that require greater attention, such as those that can only be resolved with the help of a specialist, like traumas.

We often see children afraid of pets, small insects, and even of the dreaded dark. When treated naturally, these fears usually disappear over time. With patience, parents can show the child that the little animal isn’t as bad as it seems, that the terrifying insect really does nothing, and that the dark is simply the space without light.

There are natural fears during childhood

What we cannot do is simply ignore that fear exists or, even worse, mock them when they show this reaction, because all they need is a feeling of safety from their parents as they show, talk, and teach them that a given situation does not pose any real threat. Try giving examples of situations: if a child is afraid of ants, say “an ant eats little leaves and doesn’t bite people, after all, it doesn’t have teeth.” Besides teaching your child about real situations, you’ll both end up having fun discovering things together.

When dealing with a child who is afraid, we must be careful that, instead of overcoming the fear, it does not become even greater due to the parents’ overprotection. Instead of addressing the issue calmly and trying to resolve it, some parents may isolate the child or, to avoid tears and stress, simply prevent the child from being in certain environments. Often, parents who are overprotective are those who had the same traumas in their own childhood, and since they weren’t properly addressed, they end up repeating the pattern with their children.

What should we avoid?

  • Avoid telling stories about witches, werewolves, or any frightening character. Keep your child away from horror movies, especially at night.
  • Don’t force a scared child to face the situation abruptly and without care. This will only make the fear grow even more each day.
  • Avoid passing your own fears and traumas to your children, since you are their example. If dad or mom is afraid of a gecko, for example, how can they tell their child that it won’t do any harm?
  • Don’t laugh at their fears or at the situations; this will only make the child feel even more insecure and suffer in silence.

If your child’s fears are interfering with their development and with normal childhood activities, consult a doctor who can help. Some children suffer from phobia or anxiety and should be monitored by a specialist.

See also: Sleep Disorders in Children Aged 5 to 12 Years

Photo: Lilian Rega