The dream of many women is to get pregnant, to have a beautiful, big, and healthy belly. The problem arises when infertility is present in the couple’s life. Many times this infertility has no apparent cause or reason, and dealing with this situation becomes a major challenge. Infertility is a burden for women who desperately want to get pregnant.
In the beginning, everything seems very difficult; dealing with infertility is not something easy that we are born knowing how to handle. In fact, as with all the difficulties in life, infertility seems like it will never have a solution. But that is not quite the case! Women and even men affected by infertility must be aware that in the vast majority of cases, fortunately, it is a temporary phase. Infertility may be caused by several particular factors, specific and unexpected illnesses of that person. It can also be triggered by external reasons, such as the use of some substances that worsen infertility at a certain moment of the reproductive life. The important thing to overcome the difficulties of this phase is to be aware that not all is lost.
Doctors usually give the couple about a year to get pregnant naturally. When this period is exceeded, then possible infertility in one or both partners should be considered. That is why it’s important to start the investigation by proposing simple tests and also more specific ones, such as semen analysis for men and hysterosalpingography and many others for women. Even before the first year of trying is over, it is advisable for the couple to have some more basic tests done, like hormonal tests and ultrasound, for example. These tests will provide an early diagnosis in case there is a problem with hormones or with the uterus, like a morphological alteration (bicornuate uterus) or more severe issues like endometriosis or polycystic ovaries.
The fact is that the wave of emotions that accompany these tests and this phase can be overwhelming for some couples or women. We’re not always prepared to hear an infertility diagnosis, whether it’s for an apparent reason or not. The highs and lows are just like the feelings of someone trying hard to get pregnant. That’s why it’s important to stay calm, no matter how difficult it is during this time. The feeling of giving up and of helplessness can have a huge impact when an infertility diagnosis appears. Many couples get desperate and think they will never be biological parents, but believe me—giving in to despair is the worst thing you can do.
It is important to remain calm so all other steps can be taken, and if necessary, seek a fertility specialist. There are excellent professionals who help a lot, both physically and psychologically, as they are prepared to deal with couples who want to have a baby and are facing difficulties. This is different from traditional gynecologists, who may simply order some tests and could give a diagnosis for which the proper treatment is not within their reach.
Psychological Well-being and Fertility Go Hand in Hand!
The real problem with fertility becomes even more serious when the psychological well-being of the woman or the couple starts to be shaken by pressure from themselves or their partner. Dealing with this guilt is relatively complicated, as guilt can become the villain for any couple who wants to conceive. The important thing to know is that no one has fertility problems because they want to, and certainly not on purpose. If pregnancy doesn’t happen, neither of you is to blame—rather, it is a greater force keeping this moment from coming to pass.
The couple’s unity at this time is essential to face the situation. Mutual support is important in order to overcome obstacles—whatever they may be—on the road to pregnancy. Also, setting a limit for the number of attempts is important to know when the couple or the woman is exceeding their boundaries. These rules should be discussed and agreed upon between the man and woman so they don’t exceed their physical, emotional, and financial resources.
When a couple really wants to have a baby, it seems like everyone around them suddenly gets pregnant. Because it is such a sensitive time, avoiding events involving children and babies can really help those dealing with fertility problems. Allow yourselves the right not to attend your friend’s child’s first birthday party; explain the situation, and they will surely understand. In fact, talking about your attempts is key! When family or friends pressure you too much for a baby, sharing your fertility problems should be considered. That way, the pressure will decrease a lot, as relatives and friends will know it’s a sensitive topic and will avoid inviting you to certain events that might cause you pain.
Always remember: having fertility problems does not mean you are sterile! Seeking a good professional who understands you and knows how to deal with your situation will make all the difference. Stay close to your partner and face any challenge together—this will certainly ease the pain of waiting!
See also: 5 Tricks to Get Pregnant – A Helping Hand for Nature
Photo: Corie Howell