Yesterday I had a dream… It felt so real, it felt like you were really here with me. I could smell you, feel your breathing in my lap, and hear your baby voice, which made me even more certain that you were truly present. I don’t know, I think the love I have inside me to give you makes me feel these things. I woke up missing someone I’ve never met, and whom I can’t even imagine what you’ll really be like.

Child, I want you so much… You are not just a dream, you are the dream of a lifetime that’s coming to complete mine.

I always find myself wondering what you’ll be like. Will you be a boy or a girl? Will you look like your dad? Will you look like me? Will you be a mix of the two of us? What will your temperament be like? Will you be calm, restless, mischievous, intellectual? Will you like games? Will you be interested in the same things as me? Will your hands look like mine? What color will your eyes be? My imagination goes far, visualizing you and making plans for when you are finally in my arms.

I keep wondering what it will be like to feel you inside me, when I finally discover your existence through a test. They say we don’t believe it when the moment finally comes. Will mommy believe it or will it take time for it to really sink in? I also wonder how your daddy will react.

By the way, speaking of daddy, he is also waiting for you with so much love. We have already picked out your name and we know you will be the perfect blend of the two of us, the fusion of our love that finally materializes with love and joy.

I picture myself preparing everything for your arrival. Making your layette, decorating your room, and packing the bags for the hospital. I see the happiness of so many women when they have their ultrasound1, and I put myself in their place. I think about what it’ll be like when I finally know if I’ll have a little boy or a little girl. I imagine everyone’s happiness at your baby shower, all the gifts you’ll get, and the joy of your grandmas when you arrive.

Anxiety is my middle name! I count the days and hours until you arrive in our lives. Even though I know this moment will finally come someday, I can’t wait to feel the sensation of having someone growing inside me, and that finally, one day, will call me mommy. Child, I want you so much… Do you know I’m waiting for you with such anticipation?

I pray every day asking God to finally remember us. May you come into my life so we can both make each other happy. I’m sure everything will happen at the right time, but I hope the time left until that day is as short as possible. And may it pass very quickly, so we don’t even feel it go by. Come, my child! I am waiting for you with so much love and I ask God to send you with health so we can live the greatest love in the world: the love of a mother and child. May this beautiful dream come true as soon as possible!

See also: Baby Names

Photos: prawni, Ben_Kerckx