Today we’re going to get to know Luana Santiago’s story. I met this dear woman in person and was captivated by her story! This 30-year-old from São Paulo always dreamed of being a mother, but discovered that PCOS could make things much harder, and even more so when a surprise happened after her attempts. Get to know a bit more about Luana and also about the IVF procedure she underwent. Welcome, Luana!

Luana and her husband Rodrigo

I’ll start by saying that ever since I can remember, I’ve dreamed of being a mother. When I was 13 and found out I had PCOS, I cried a lot because at that time I thought all hope was lost. I was just a girl and didn’t understand what it meant. As time went by, I began to understand what it was and also realized it wasn’t as I imagined, that I really could become a mother. I’ll admit that from then on, I already imagined or felt that I would have difficulties, that I would need to undergo more specific treatments, that maybe it would take a bit longer than usual, because my periods were always completely irregular, but I never imagined it would be so hard.

When we got married, I planned that we would start trying to get pregnant after 5 years of marriage, and so we did. We married in 2007 and in 2012 we started trying. After a year of trying, nothing happened. We looked for a human reproduction specialist to try to understand what was going on. Besides PCOS, I also have hypothyroidism, factors that make my cycle irregular, so my cycles are completely crazy and most of the time anovulatory. I’ve always been someone who just lets life lead me, I couldn’t keep perfect track of ovulation periods, basal temperature, cervical mucus, etc. Gradually I learned a few things, but I never tracked things precisely.

After the couple’s exams, we had another surprise: my husband’s sperm analysis wasn’t very good. The quantity was normal, but the quality was poor. Right away, IVF was recommended, as it would be the most precise route to achieve pregnancy. At that moment, my world collapsed for the second time (the first was when I was diagnosed with PCOS), because everything was so expensive and we couldn’t afford the treatment.

Once again, I didn’t fully understand what IVF was, so I started watching videos, searching the internet, reading a lot, and joining Facebook groups to learn from the experiences of people who were going through the same thing. That was when I discovered egg donation. I thought it was wonderful, because not only did it solve the financial issue by making my treatment free so I could fulfill my dream, it would also help someone else achieve the same dream as mine—to become a mother. That would be very rewarding for me.

I visited some clinics and signed up as a donor. I did all the required exams and everything was fine. Now I just had to wait to find a recipient for my eggs. After 4 months of waiting, I was called by one of the clinics to start the treatment. I took the contraceptive Gynera for a few days and then got my period right after. On the 3rd day of my cycle I started taking the ovulation stimulator called Gonal F 300iu for 5 days. Then I had an ultrasound on the 6th day of medication, and the doctor said I had 10 follicles, but that this wasn’t a good number to be a donor. He then increased the dose and at the next ultrasound, if there was no improvement, we would have to cancel that cycle’s treatment. From the 6th day on medication and the 9th day of my cycle, I added Luveris 75iu in addition to Gonal. From then on, I had ultrasounds every other day.

At the next ultrasound, the doctor said there was an improvement, and that we could continue the treatment. He also added Orgalutran in addition to the other medications mentioned. After another ultrasound, the egg and sperm collection were scheduled. 36 hours before retrieval, I took all the medications mentioned and added ovidrel to trigger follicle rupture and egg release. I forgot to mention that during the stimulation I felt only ovary pain, but after about a week of medication, there was also a lot of gas, haha.

On collection day, I fasted completely, had general anesthesia, and the retrieval was done. It was very calm, I didn’t feel anything except for mild cramps that day. The result of the retrieval and embryos comes the next day. The next day I got a call telling me I had 14 eggs, 7 of which were mine and 6 donated. Of my 7, only 3 fertilized and became embryos. For 5 days, the embryologists called to tell me about the progress of these embryos, but in the end, one stopped developing and 2 blastocysts were left to be transferred to my uterus.

On the 5th day after retrieval was transfer day. No fasting required, just a full bladder. The transfer is done through a catheter that’s inserted into the uterus in the gynecological position and guided by pelvic ultrasound. It takes less than 5 minutes and is very calm, it doesn’t hurt at all. Right after, I was allowed to go home and just stay on total bed rest that day.

After this, there are 12 long days of waiting for the beta HCG test to finally know if all this led to a positive result. The anxiety is overwhelming, time seems to stand still. During this period, I had mild cramps, a breast pain very different from PMS and also some light bleeding, but a very bright red, thin like juice, which lasted 6 days. The doctors told me to stay calm, that these were signs of implantation, but if it got heavier or had clots, I should inform them. Oh! Another thing that happened was that I started peeing a lot more than ever before. All this made me believe it had worked!

Luana and I met a few weeks ago and I was smitten with her!

 

The 12 days passed and finally beta day arrived. It was a Saturday—I couldn’t wait until Monday to get the result. So I went to an urgent care center, where the results would be ready in 2 hours. For me, it was the most beautiful result I’ve ever seen, it was positive! However, the value was still low, but positive. When you do IVF, the proper procedure is to repeat the test every two days to monitor progress. In a normal pregnancy, the HCG hormone level should double every 2 days.

So after 2 days I repeated the beta. The value went up but didn’t double. I was apprehensive but hopeful because it had at least increased. Another 2 days, and I did another beta, and then the value dropped. That day, the doctor made it very clear that a miscarriage would happen… For the third time, my world collapsed but I still didn’t want to believe it! Even though I already knew that when beta drops, the pregnancy isn’t progressing. I knew what it meant but deep down, I had faith that God could turn things around, after all, He is the God of the impossible for humans, but everything is possible for Him. Even so, I felt awful. It was the worst week of my life! I cried every day and everywhere.

I questioned God as to why all this was happening. I got angry remembering so many stories I’d heard about women who have abortions, mistreat, abandon, or even kill their children. So many women who never wanted kids end up pregnant, who don’t truly love their children… And I, who wanted it so badly, who wished for and planned it, had so much love to give. Did I really have to go through this? Not just me, but all the other women who, like me, are desperate for a child and go through things like this…

Eventually, after a week of suffering, since I didn’t know when it would actually happen, the inevitable finally occurred. It could have been worse, but I didn’t need a curettage, which is very painful… I had very heavy bleeding like I’d never had before.

A few days later I went back to the clinic, the doctor said there was no way to know why. There was no apparent cause and all my exams were fine, but that it’s common in a first pregnancy. There probably was a malformation and that’s why the pregnancy didn’t progress. He also said that since I didn’t have the expected ovarian response, I couldn’t donate again. I was already feeling awful about everything that happened, and my hope was that I could donate again. So it got even worse. When they needed me I was treated very well, but when I needed support, it wasn’t as I expected and they even gave me a NO to the only opportunity I felt I had at that moment. I felt used, I guess. It was tough, but I survived.

But despite the disappointment and trauma, I don’t regret anything I did. Honestly, I’d do it all again as many times as needed, because, above all, I had the opportunity to help someone achieve one of their biggest dreams. I don’t know what the outcome was for the recipient, because the process is completely anonymous, we know nothing about each other. I truly hope with all my heart that her outcome was better than mine and that right now she’s holding her miracle in her arms. And what I can say to wrap up is that I didn’t give up! I got up again and found strength to fight once more, and soon I will also have my miracle in my arms!

Luana Santiago, still trying and anxiously waiting for her special moment to become a mom. She shares her IVF experiences on the YouTube channel she started to provide more information on the subject and share her story.

Also see: Motherhood Was Always My Dream – Scila Passos