When a mom finds out she’s pregnant or even arrives home from the hospital with her newborn baby, thousands of questions may start to pop up about how to care for her baby. One of the questions—and also one of the debates among moms—is where to put the baby to sleep at night or even during afternoon naps. It’s important to note that a newborn really misses the environment they were in throughout the pregnancy. The womb is no longer their home, and now they need to adapt to the new situation—and of course, so does the mom. Bringing a new family member affects the routine a lot, and some adjustments are necessary, which brings up the question: should you put the crib in the parents’ room? Should the baby sleep in their own room from day one? Should you keep a bassinet in the room? Should the baby sleep in the stroller? Should the baby sleep in the parents’ bed?
Parents prepare a room or a special corner of the house for the long-awaited baby and find themselves in a dilemma, afraid to leave the baby alone in the room after birth. I was a fan of having the crib in my room, although many friends chose to put their newborn straight in the baby’s room to sleep at night or during the day. I thought it was more practical to have the baby in the room with me during the first months. Not only because of safety concerns but also to make things easier at night and during breastfeeding. My eldest stayed with me, from newborn until she was one year old, in the same room. I was much more insecure than I am now, and this made a big difference for my peace of mind at the time. As soon as I moved the crib to her room, she never slept a single night in my room again. Although this was my experience, specialists actually advise the opposite: having your baby sleep in their own room from the very first day to help them get used to it and not become too dependent when older.
Of course, nowadays technology is very advanced and there are more and more devices and equipment that can help monitor a newborn in their own space. There’s even video monitoring so parents can rest easy at night. The market for these kinds of devices—baby monitors—has been growing every day and is also increasingly accessible, because with the ease of traveling abroad, they’re much cheaper to import, and even in Brazil prices continue to improve. The only situation that no specialist recommends, and neither would I, is putting your newborn baby to sleep in the parents’ bed. It may seem convenient and easy for the mom, but the risks are high when it comes to safety. Imagine sleeping after just a few hours of rest and accidentally rolling onto the baby, or breastfeeding while lying down and falling asleep with your breast covering the baby’s nose? That’s why it’s best to have a place where the baby can sleep alone, whether it’s a bassinet, a portable crib, a travel crib in the parents’ room, or in their own nursery.
My friend Alice has a boy and a girl and shared her experiences. “Before I had Natália, I used to say I’d never let the baby sleep in my room—I said the couple’s privacy had to be maintained even after the kids are born—but when I got home from the hospital, it was completely different. Natália stayed in my room for 4 months until I felt confident enough to leave her alone in her room. With Murilo, it was different: I already knew he’d stay in the room for the first few months, and by 3 months I moved him to the room where Natália already slept. Both transitions were smooth, especially because I always put them down for naps during the day in their own room so they could get used to it. I still believe the couple should have their own space, but if they agree, you can open up that space just for this period when it may be necessary to have the baby in your room for a while.”
As I’ve said in the manual, the best sleeping position for a newborn is on their side or on their back, according to the latest pediatric recommendations. But even these positions are still being studied to determine which is best, with only agreement that the baby should not lie on their stomach because their neck isn’t strong enough and there’s a risk of suffocation. Using side supports to help the baby stay on their side is also very useful and works perfectly. So, after all, should you put the baby in the parents’ room or not? This is a decision that should be made by the parents. Of course, it’s much easier at night, but each couple should decide and weigh the pros and cons of both situations and prioritize what’s most important for them. If letting mom sleep better means keeping the baby in your room, then do it. If you feel more comfortable putting them in their own space and are prepared with monitoring equipment like a baby monitor—or even without these devices—then that’s okay too! Why not? Every couple has their own way of thinking; the most important thing at this moment is to be calm and give your baby that sense of security, and enjoy all the love that this beautiful time with a newborn brings. I hope I’ve helped. Kisses
Also see: A Basic Guide to Baby Care – Dressing and Cutting Nails
Photo: Lou Haach
